Intervention

I am a big fan of this show. I am watching two brothers that are heroin addicts right now. They smoke heroin, which is odd in itself. It is a Mexican family, which is rare on this show, and they are selling and using large quantities of heroin. The parents are in complete denial.

I often wonder what my parents would have done of if I started the habits I later had in life under their roof. I am pretty sure they would not have had an intervention on tv. They would have had a major incident on their hands and probably pleaded out and served probation instead of jail time.

These were just not options growing up. I think I smoked pot a handful of times in high school, and i drank a bunch. But the drinking was accepted because I was the son. I was popular, not to toot my own horn, and I was in the middle of everything. But I cannot imagine doing coke in my living room growing up or smoking crack in my backyard. Just on a side note, I never smoked crack, that was a dirty drug. Never poked a needle either, because that was what homeless junkies do. It is a double stndard. There are acceptable drugs amongst the people that I rolled with...literally rolled with.

I remember once that my father pulled me into the backyard and told me not to do drugs. That was my drug talk. He thought that since I was coughing in the shower that I was smoking pot. He was concerned that it would affect my football playing that year. He said he had smoked cigarettes for 20 years and did not cough like I did. I guess that is good logic.

I smoked cigarettes from 14 to 30. I drank from 14 to 28. I often wonder the reason behind that. Is it because of peer pressure or because it was okay or if it was becsause my father did it. I don't know. I think that a lot of this addiction is learned behavior that then twists the wires in your head until you are sick.

I have always had the 'addictive personality'. I like to go for fourths at the buffet as a kid. i always wanted seconds at dinner. i was a fat little kid and I am big old adult. You don't weigh in at 280 because you are using proper protions. It was deemed okay that I eat more. It was burned into my head as a youngster that these were okay things to do. I wanted more toys than other people. I wanted more cd's than other people. More rock n roll t shirts. More of this and more of that. I went on a Tommy Hilfiger and Polo thing during high school. I did whatever it took to get the clothes I wanted. I have always had this type of addiction to consumption.

I wonder if the people on intervention are like that. Did these little Mexican brothers do the same thing? what made them cross that line to smoking heroin. Could I have ever gone there? Glad I didn't.

well, let's see if they accept help. I sometimes root for them to fail. Kind of sick thinking. But it reminds me that I can fail at this and it makes me grateful that they did it and I didn't.